To cold for school or just want a 3 day weekend for the steelers game??

So after a long day at work I come home and get relaxed and ready to sit to wacth tv. I turn on the TV and I see that a plane take a crash landing into the Hudson river in NYC. Thank God that everyone survived and the plane stayed in tacked. I have to give kudos to the pilot and the NY rescue crews who were there on first reponse, even the ferry and pleasure boats who aborted their schedules to help out deserve thanks. This however isn't what I wanted to discuss. As I was watching this story develop and the national news switching over to the local news I was reading the bottom lines for cancellations for Friday. I can't help to remember when I was in school we didn't have many cancellations or even 2 hr. delays. I don't think I can even name a school district in the surrounding area of the city of Pittsburgh that hasn't cancelled already. What the hell is going on ?? I remember when I was in school it was like get your ass to school no matter what. They didn't give a shit how much snow was on the ground or how cold it was outside. Instead, once we got to school we use to all hear the horror stories well when I was your age school buses never got back to where we lived and we didn't have a car for the kids. We had to walk to school to and fro up hill in snow up to our knees...blah blah blah...you know how the rest of the story goes.

So what the hell is really going on ? I don't know if you heard this yet, but the Pittsburgh Steelers have a pretty big game this weekend. The game is known as the AFC CHAMPIONSHIP GAME. My thinking on this is people meaning teachers, school advisors, and principals found their way out to enjoy a 3 day weekend. This way they can get another day of stuff done and enjoy their Sunday of watching the Steelers beat the shit out of the Ravens and do nothing more with their day then just that. I am actually waiting to watch the news tommorrow or Sunday night and see them start the cancellations or atleast 2 hr delays for Monday already..lol..

The bottom line is (I apologize for my Stone Cold Steve Austin reference) if your really cancelling school because of the weather thats fine or maybe it is not because I am rather bitter I never got to expierence days like that. Maybe you should bundle up and not be a bitch and get your ass to school. I have to go to work Friday. The Steelers aren"t cancelling work tommorrow nor are they cancelling the game. I am also betting that people are planning on going to the game whether it be 0 degrees outside and snowing or 75 degrees out and sunny. If your going to cancel school this far ahead of time, why dont we just declare this fucking weekend a holiday for western PA and give everyone off. This way we can all start our pregame tailgate to take on the shit talking Baltimore Ravens and their shit talking fans.

Go Steelers!!

I Almost Got Killed Today

I almost died today. And it wasn't because I swollowed somthing with a Mr. Yuck sticker on it.

This is actually somthing that all of us except Bice can relate too, since we all still live in the Western Pennsylvania region. As most of you know, we've gotten a shit load of snow recently. I actually enjoyed watching it snow until my dad made me shovel it all. Then I hated it. But regardless, it has snowed a ton lately. And today I almost died because of it.

It should first be noted that I think Penn DOT (PA Dept. of Transportation) has been really lazy lately. I don't see what is so hard about keeping the roads safe. I would like to make note on this blog that when I would be driving to work around 4am, I would see Penn DOT trucks parked along side the road doing nothing. It's nice to see that our tax dollars are being spent on a couple of lazy guys that like to sleep.

Now, I was drving along one of our beautiful roadways in the great state of Pennsylvania (by the way, it should also be noted that I used to love the slogan "You've Got a Friend In Pennsylvania" that used to be on license plates) when I noticed on a particular section it appeared to be snow covered. It was snowing so I assumed that it was just a section they hadn't got to. But it wasn't snowing bad or anything. As I was driving I slowed down to a safe speed so that I could avoid a crash. The lanes were mostly clear except right down the middle, so I was driving over a coating of snow that was about a half inch or more. All of a sudden, as I was negoitating a turn, my car began to slide out of control. I was lucky to manage a save, as I began sliding into another lane when a car was coming. I managed to stay in my lane but then I almost slid over the side of a hill. Luckily my tires got away from the snow and I got slowed down. It was a close call for sure. Then when I told my dear mother of the incident, she just laughed at me like I exaggerate every thing that goes on in my life. Whatev. The point is Penn DOT should take better care of the roadways, otherwise a somewhat famous individual could have died today. That is all of my story. I hope you all learned a valuable lesson today. Godspeed.

Before I go here are a couple things you should know. On ESPN.com, Rick Reilly, the guy who used to write for Sports Illustrated, wrote a great piece on Beer Pong. I am sure Bones will leave a post sometime in the next day or two either endorsing it, or calling it jibberish. And the picture of the chick in this post is my new girlfriend. Not really, but she probably wants me anyway.

Fat Gorzo loses weight!

Tom and his trainer during a break in their off season workout.

Good news Pirate fans. Your season is saved. Old Gorzelanny will be showing up to camp 15 pounds lighter, according to an article in today's Post-Gazette. The losing ends now!

Is it just me or do we get an article like this every year? Some player, who underperformed the last season, shows up to camp 15 pounds skinnier yet still ends up playing like garbage. I specifically remember such articles for Fat Ronny Paulino and Craig Wilson but I'm sure there have been more. However, there was one about Ryan Doumit last year, but I think he put on muscle so who knows.

My question is "Why are these guys out of shape in the first place?" Sure, they play baseball, which is the laziest sport in the world, but come on, it shouldn't be that hard to take care of yourself. And why did management let him get to this point? Wouldn't it be in their best interest to keep tabs on someone who was their best pitcher just one year prior?

Maybe this is why Jeff Andrews was fired. Hopefully the new pitching coach will make sure Tom stops having hamburger eating contests with Matt Capps.

Never Stomp On A Dead Guy's Towel

I think people will laugh at me after I say this. Hell, I'll probably get made fun of. But I just knew that back in week 16 after Tennessee Titans players Lendell White and Keith Bulluck stomped on the Terrible Towel, they wouldn't make it to the Super Bowl. Many people may think that the Terrible Towel is just a stupid yellow towel that a bunch of crazy Steeler fans wave like lunatics during games. Well I've got news for ya.....It's not.

Myron Cope was the one person that created the enitre towel waving craze.

He was a genius. The best part is that the proceeds go towards a good cause.

"THE TERRIBLE TOWEL is not an instrument of witchcraft...It is not a hex upon the enemy. THE TOWEL is a positive force that lifts the Steelers to magnificent heights-and poses mysterious difficulties for the Steelers' opponents only if need be. Many have told me that THE TERRIBLE TOWEL brought them good fortune, but I can't guarentee that sort of thing because the Steelers, after all, are THE TOWELS primary concern. Still, at least, the symbol of THE TERRIBLE TOWEL will serve as a momento to your having been a part of the Steelers Dynasty and if it causes good things to happen to you, so much the better." - Myron Cope

Say what you want, but I think that disgracing THE TOWEL is a big mistake. Think about it. Back when the Steelers won their last Super Bowl the Cincinnatti Bengals Wide Reciever TJ Who's Yo Mama wiped his feet with THE TOWEL. They lost and haven't been the same since. Although we didn't play them, I sure would have liked to because I think we would have beat them. But thats just my opinon.

Holy Hockey Hell

The Penguins could very well have their season on the line tonight when they play the Flyers. Regardless, I don't think they are out of it yet. An entire half of hockey has yet to be played and whoever is in the top 8 of each conference after that makes the playoffs. Anything can happen. Which is why I want to make this point. One of three things will happen with the Penguins. 1) the Pens will stay the course with the way things are and hope it all turns around, 2) Fire Head Coach Michael Therrien or 3) Make a trade for a scoring winger to play with Sidney Crosby.

Whatever happens keep this in mind. Trades dont solve your problems. Think back to last year at the deadline and what we gave up (Colby, Esposito, Christianson and 1st round pick) and what we still have (Dupuis...no Hossa). Firing a coach won't solve problems either. This slump is the players fault. The Pens are hurt and it isn't fair to judge them until they are healthy. Who know's maybe Gonchar will help the team's struggeling power play. But keep this in mind too. Firing a coach may throw this enitre season off, yet help them next season. Chemistry is a huge part of wining hockey and right now the Pens don't have it. Don't fire Therrien.

Predictions

I'll make this short and sweet...

NFC Championship Game

Philadelphia @ Arizona (FOX Sun. 3pm)

Arizona looked good the other night against Carolina, although I didn't watch the game, forcing 6 turnovers is very impressive. But that is the point. They don't do it all the time and clearly even the best defenses don't force that many turnovers all the time. It was a fluke. But the Cards looked dangerous. But I think Philly may be tougher and better. But I don't like their history in NFC Championships.

Arizona 28-17

AFC Championship Game

Baltimore @ Pittsburgh (CBS Sun. 6:30pm)

I love this matchup. But I'll be honest I don't think it will be the game people think it is going to be. The Ravens are banged up. Flacco is a rookie QB. Steelers are pretty much healthy. This is the third game of the season these two teams will play and the first two were close. I doubt this one is. The Ravens may be able to get some decent gains, but the Steelers will shut down the run and force Flacco to throw and he will finally make a mistake or two.

Pittsburgh 24-9

Thank You BICE!

I would just like to say thank you to Jason Bice. Mr Bice has invited me to join this wonderful blog probaly to honor the diplomas that we have from the same high school. I would like to take this moment and thank some of the people and companies that can make this event possible for me: HP for making a wonderful PC for me to conduct my work on, Ashland for making such a fine quality chair and computer stand, Time Warner Cable for providing me with the slowest internet connection in the western civilization. This event would not be possible without there wonderful products.

IT'S BIRDSEASON IN THE BURGH!!

As one season ends another one begins in the Burgh. After ending the season and sending the cocky Philip Rivers as well as DUI Jackson back to San Diego, a new season has begun. It is bird hunting season in Pittsburgh and its even being extended into Tampa. (How you like that one Bice..lol) The game against the Chargers this past weekend was one that was dominated not only on the defensive side, but on the offensive side as well. The offensive line may have played their best game since the Texans game. Willie Colon and Max Starks were playing like Pro Bowlers... well maybe that is a stretch, but you catch my drift. Ben had all day to throw even though he sailed a couple of balls, I will always give credit to him, since I am always quick to bash him when he makes a mistake. The ball he threw to Hines down in the redzone after he over threw Holmes was a beauty, tight spiral and actually had some zing on it for once. I wonder if all that was possible because of our O - line play. Willie found his toughness and speed again and how huge was the cutting and resiging of Gary Russell. His tough couple yards around the goaline have been huge late in the season. I must say for once the bye week may have done us good.

Before I move on to talk about how much happier I am that we are playing the Ravens, rather then the Titans. I think it is only right to give the special teams unit some credit for this yr and this last game against the Chargers. The punt return by Holmes was a great momentum and crowd pleaser and Mitch Berger, I knew there was a reason we signed him back to our team. So he could punt the ball off opposing players helmets. Not bad, that may have made up for all your 28 yard avg punts you were giving us in the regular season.

Bring on the Ravens!! Wow I knew Baltimore was a good football team and Joe Flacco was a pretty damn good QB espically for being a rookie. However, I didn't know that they were magicians. The way they escaped from their game with the Titans with a win was better then watching some 24 hr stupid ass David Blane trick. If the Titans new how to hang on to the ball in the redzone we would be facing what i consider a very dangerous Titans team. Fortunatly for us we get to play a familiar foe , who looked tired, and beat up in the Baltimore Ravens. We all know as Steelers fans, the Ravens bark is much bigger then their bite, so we are not intimidated by their diherria of the mouth. We know what to expect, it is going to be a war and a draining battle. The best thing we have going for us and we haven't had to play 2 weeks in a row on the road prior to this game. Trust me this is who we want to play, espically with a young o - line and Ben at Qb. We want to play someone we know very well and at home.

SUNDAYS PREDICTIONS - I think this will be the game you will see Joe Flacco make some mistakes. Tricky Dick is going to put the game in Young Joey's hands and let him try to beat us with his arm as oppose to that running game that will not have much success Sunday. I also think the Steelers are going to try and do what they did against the chargers and that is impose their will on that Ravens defense and try to run the ball down their throats and force them to make tackles .(something they were struggling to do against the quick Chris Johnson of the Titans) Ben has to play like he did this past week and take care of the ball and make the throws he can knows he can make not the ones he wishes he could make.

Final Score - Ravens 10 - Steelers 20

In the NFC CHAMPIONSHIP game both of these teams have the ability to surprise you and that is obvious since they are both one game away from the Superbowl. These two teams also have the ability to shit the bed as well. However, they are both playing at a high level and both of them look like totally different teams from what they looked like in the regular season. I give the slight edge to the Cardinals. They are putting up points in the playoffs whenever they want and they are running the football very well. They also will be getting back the talented Boldin. Their defense is playing with a lot of energy ,flying to the ball, which makes me wonder after they clinched that berth for playoffs if they weren't holding back and saving it all for this moment. They have only loss once at home all yr and that stadium when closed is loud. I don't think Fat Andy Reid and his pass happy play calling will not work this game and McNabb will struggle. Kurt Warner will make all the right decisions and it will be a reunion of PA players and coaches in the Superbowl. Arizona wins and gives Andy Reid a heart attack and puts him on the subway diet

Final Score -Eagles 16 Cardinals 27

Lets hope you all stay away from any parties that RAY RAY and friends are throwing around the Superbowl..we all know how that story ends...lol

One for Antonio Alfonseca's Deformed 6th finger!

Santonio is running so fast because he heard Bones is on the prowl!

I know it's a lame title but we can't say one for the thumb anymore. Although that in itself didn't make much sense because rings usually don't fit on thumbs. They're too fat. Its science.

Anyways......

After teaching Sham Diego (you like that Bones?) the Steelers are but one game away from playing in their seventh trip to the Super Bowl. Standing in their way: The Baltimore Ravens.

Unfortunately, Ray won't be in jail, where he belongs, come Sunday.

Out of everyone in the AFC, the Ravens are the team I hate to see the most in the game. Not because they're a fierce rival and always give the Steelers a tough game but because the Steelers have already beaten them twice this year. This means that, whether they win or lose, some headline somewhere will say "Third Time's a Charm!" I can see this overused cliche showing up on ESPN but wouldn't be surpised if I saw it in the Post Gazette or the Tribune Review. I'm calling it right now and after the game I am going to find it and post the link right here on CGO!

Yes, I am an asshole!

In other news, some douchebag came into the pizza shop tonight wearing sunglasses. I wanted to punch him on the face. The I noticed he was wearing shoes with purple shoelaces so I murdered him. I'll probably be in jail soon so I may not be able to blog for a while. Oh Well.

Customer Service

As promised in my previous blog I will now share a story with all of you about my holiday season adventures at Hollister. I really like my job as a manager at Hollister on a day to day basis. The people I work with are great. The vast majority of customers are nice people. There are however from time to time some of the most absurd people in the history of time who grace my store and make me want to kill people. This story involves a woman, a coat and a few unsuspecting children/customers caught in the crossfire.

First some backstory on Abercrombie/Hollister's company policy. It is part of that policy that price adjustments can be done within 14 days of your purchase. So for those of you who are wondering just what the fuck i am talking about, this means that if you buy something and it goes on sale within 14 days we can give it to you for sale price if you have your receipt. If it is outside of 14 days you are basically shit out of luck.

So Tammy Twat Bag comes in and asks me if she can get a price adjustment on her coat. I say "Sure thing! As long as it is within 14 days that is no problem!" I look at the receipt and see it has been over 14 days since she bought said coat. In fact it was more like 20.

So, I say, "Oh I'm sorry it has been over 14 days I can't give you the price adjustment. Anything else I can help you with?"

She gives a little attitude and then says "Why not? It's $60 cheaper now I should be able to get it back.

Me- "We can't do any price adjustments outside of 14 days, If you want to return this coat and look to see if you find another coat on sale that is fine. I just can't adjust the price on this one."

Tammy Twat Bag thinking she will beat the system - "Well how about this? I'm just going to return the coat and then re-buy is for the sale price."

Me- "We can't do that mam, we take all of our returns into the back to re-sensor them and inspect them for quality issues before we can re-sell them."

Tammy Twat - "Well you don't need to do that because I'm just re-buying it."

Me- "Well actually I do need to do that it is company policy."

Twat - "Well that's ridiculous, I should be allowed to do this it's $60"

Me- "I'm sorry you feel it is ridiculous but it is company policy and I can't do anything about it. You can look for the coat on the floor, return this coat and just buy the new one for the sale price but that's all I can do for you."

Twat (with infant child in arms)- This is fucking stupid. Fine, where are they?

I direct her to the coats and go about my business of running the store. She however finds it necessary to create a scene by cursing, slamming things and being a bitch especially to her children who did nothing to provoke her assholery. She gets back in line to again disrupt everyone shopping and irritating me more. She brings the coat up and then realizes that, at her own fault, she picked up the wrong size. Swears some more slams shit around kicked a chair in our lounge area and says "I have to fucking wait in line again?" She then begins to whine for about 10 minutes about just returning and re buying the coat to no avail. I think she was half expecting me to change my stance on company policy because she was being a rude bitch, not the case. Even if she would have been even remotely nice I still would not have done it because it's AGAINST FUCKING COMPANY POLICY. I don't think she realizes that being a bitch will never get you what you want in Trick's world. She then says "This is fucking ridiculous I'm leaving." Scoffs, pushes yet another chair and physically abuses one of her children by grabbing his arm and dragging him out of the store.

You think the story is over well think again.

About an hour later I see her back in the store. Now at some point in that hour between our meetings she bought another coat. One of the cashiers calls me over and tells me the coat she was trying to return was not on the receipt she provided.

The bitch was trying to return the coat she had just purchased for $80 as the $140 coat she had bought before. Yeah, she was a real piece of work.

Me- "Mam this is not the same coat as is on here I can't return it with this receipt"

Twat - "Why not?"

Me- "Because it's not the same coat, I can't return it with the receipt to a different coat"

Twat- " Why? I just want this coat for the $80 dollars and your stupid store won't return it so I can just re buy it so I'm returning this one so I can get the $60 back."

Me- "Mam that makes no sense at all."

Twat - "I just want the $60 dollars back and you say you can't do it. I think that this is bullshit"

Me- "I'm sorry you feel that way but I don't make the policies, I just follow them"

Twat- "I just don't get why I can't do this and get my money back"

Me- "Mam, I told you it has been over 14 days, we don't do price adjustments after 14 days. It even says so on the back of your receipt. I gave you the option to buy another coat and return this one. It's not the store's fault we don't have any of your size left. I can't just let you return and re buy it. We take everything in the back like I said, I can't change that."

Twat- "What so now I have two fucking coats, what am I going to do with two coats, this is so crazy I can't even believe this."


I wish to take this time to remind you that this is going on at a busy time of the day with about 20 customers consisting of men, women and children all in earshot. Many of whom were her own children who I would like to take the time to say a prayer for as they have a lunatic mother and my end up doing harm to themselves or others at her behalf.....

OK now back to the story.


Me- " It's not crazy it's completely logical. I can't return your coat that you paid $80 for and give you $140. You can return the coat you just bought for the price you paid for it and then you just have one coat, the original one you bought with this receipt and you will be in the same position as when you walked in to the store."

Twat- "This is just crazy, I don't understand why I can't just return it and re-buy it"

Me- "I just told you why mam"

Twat- " But don't you understand that's 60 dollars? I'm losing 60 dollars."

Me Getting Pissed- "Mam if we return your coat the company is losing $60. You can't just return something and re buy it for it's new price whenever you want. With that logic anyone could buy something and a year from now bring in the receipt and re buy a $150 item for $10. That is just silly. The company has it's policies on the back of the receipt so people who can read will be able to avoid situations like this that would make the company lose money, however it is not fail safe as we find ourselves in this position. I can't return your coat, bottom line. You can return the coat you just bought with it's correct receipt.

Twat still not understanding logical points - "Whatever this is just crazy. I'm never coming to this bullshit store again."

I returned her coat and when money is put back on a credit card we need to verify with the last 4 digits of the card number for the computer system to process the return. I asked her for the numbers and she said "What? Why do you need those??"

Me- "To verify the card to the register so it can process the sale."

Twat-" Oh I thought you were going to say it wasn't my card. Like you were saying I was lying with how crazy this store is."

Me- "OK mam, have a good day."

She then stormed out cursing the Hollister name yet again and physically harming her children because her coat couldn't be price adjusted. I could see her spanking her kids with a wire hanger because the most recent season of "Desperate Housewives" ended.

So there you have it just one of many stories about insane customers harming children and swearing at strangers because of clothing. What a wonderful world we live in.

The End.

A self-serving arrogant jerk

Jerk

Since I didn't get the chance to put anything up on the BCS championship which Florida won, I will now write a little piece on a coach who is making a rapid ascent up my hatred charts. Urban Meyer or as I like to refer to him as Urban Crier. Now being a Seminole fan you have to realize this is inherently biased but the man is an arrogant jerk. He sprays and spouts more arrogance than this man:

Rick "The Model" Martel

Where to start on this one. Let's start with the claim that Crier made that Florida only takes the "top one percent of the top one percent." Hmmm...great call Urban and even better when your athletes don't really perform too admirably in the classroom.

An investigation by the Atlanta-Journal Constitution, discovered that UF's football and basketball players score 346 pts lower on SAT than the average UF student. Here's the piece. I'm pretty sure that the University of Florida's students aren't necessarily dumb but they sure as shit aren't Ivy League quality. So are they really the top one percent of the top one percent as Crier so arrogantly boasted?

Now this looks even worse considering their rival school, who isn't really known for its academic prowess, produces a Rhodes scholar.

Spot the hypocrisy

Another issue with Crier is how he always mentions that Notre Dame is his dream job. Christ, for all the University of Florida has done for him (nothing short of offering him 40 virgins) can't he just keep his mouth shut? Go ahead Urban, go up to Notre Dame. Try recruiting your "top one percent" of athletes who don't do so well academically to Notre Dame. Oh wait they probably wouldn't get in there. Show some respect towards the college that has given you everything you arrogant jack-ass. Okay so Notre Dame is your dream job that's fine. Just don't go spewing it out everywhere, it's a slap in the face to Florida.

Another example of Crier class was when they kicked a meaningless field goal against Miami when they were blowing them out. Don't get me wrong, I always enjoy a good Hurricane ass kicking but you already made your point. This led to Warren Sapp calling Crier a "classless jerk."

What pisses me off even more is that Florida (barring Tebow going pro) starts zero seniors on defense. They will probably be odds-on favorites again next year.

I wasn't able to catch any of the national title game because work was quite busy. I'm sure the commentating was a Tebow fellatio fun fest. Verne Lundquist, on CBS, probably prays to Lord Tebow before he goes to sleep every night.

Okay that's enough talking about Florida before I barf all over my screen. Now I get to buckle down and get ready for the 6-10 inches of snow they are calling for this area.

GO STEELERS!!!

My How The Tables Have Turned!

In case you haven't noticed, the Pittsburgh Penguins are on the verge of falling of the face of the earth. It hasn't been a very good couple of months for the boys of winter, but I have a feeling that a major change is coming. I don't know if Therrien will be fired or if Ray Shero will bring in a winger to play with Crosby, but somthing will happen.

With that being said, a possibility is that Miroslav Satan could be traded. I haven't heard or read anything, but statistics show that Satan is on pace for his lowest goal output (24 goals) in more than a decade....and he is playing with Sidney Crosby. Ouch! I guess if it's not meant to be, it's time for a change.

The penguins are in a horrible slump. It's so bad that they have officially fallen out of the playoffs. They currently have 44 points, leaving them in a tie for 9th place in the Eastern Conference with Florida. Boston leads the East with 64 points. The good news is if the Pens get their shit together, they aren't too far out to get back into the playoffs. Montreal is 4th in the East and has 54 points, which is the last spot in the East that has home ice in the playoffs. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. The Pens are only 20-18-4 as of today and before their slump, they were 14-6-4 at the end of November, so at least they are still above .500. The Pens are typically a second half team, so they may turn it on at any moment. Keep the faith.

3 Stars In a Row
This has to be a dream come true for the NHL. Guess who the top three scorers are in the NHL? Malkin (63), Ovechkin (53) and Crosby (53). Ovechkin has the edge over Crosby because of his goal total, which is leading the league (27 overall). Ovechkin appears to be on pace to lead the league in goals with some total in the 50 to 60 range. Malkin at one point was on pace to score 160 points, which would have made him the last player since Mario Lemieux (161) in 1995-96 to do so. Malkin is capable of doing it, maybe more so than Crosby or Ovechkin, so just remember you heard it here first. Malkin is currently on pace to score around 120 points.

Anniversary's Galore
This is somthing that went unnoticed, but I think it always goes relatively unnoticed anyway, but an interesting anniversary (20th Anniversary) passed on New Year's Eve. It was in 1988 that Mario Lemieux became the only player in the history of the NHL to score 5 goals 5 different ways (even strength, power play, shorthanded, penalty shot, and empty net). I doubt that anyone will ever do that again. But I'll bet that nobody thought it would be done before Super Mario did it anyway, so who knows.

Another anniversary that I think goes unnoticed all the time is a sad one. Roberto Clemente died on New Year's Eve in 1972. This was the 36th anniversary of his death in a plane crash. He died doing somthing that no athlete would ever think of doing, except maybe Tim Tebow. Clemente was taking relief supplies to Nicaragua, which had just suffered from an earthquake. Clemente has exactly 3,000 hits on MLB's hits list.

December 23, 1972 was also a special time. It happened to be day of arguably the greatest play in football history. Pittsburgh Steelers hosting the Oakland Raiders in a playoff game and when all hope was lost, the football gods smiled down on Steeler Nation and rookie Franco Harris galloped into the end zone on a freak play and scored to win. The play is known as the "Immaculate Reception" and it still has controversy to this day.

One Last Thing...
The Penguins rewarded Jordan Stall with a new contract. It's a 4-year deal worth $16 Million. I like the signing because Stall is young, although I know I bashed him last year for slumping. Stall obviously had a great start to his career, but I hope that his best years are ahead of him. He has the potential. But remember that his trade value is up too. If people in the organization lose faith in him they won't hesitate to trade him and I doubt that any team would not hesitate to grab him. Hopefully he is in Pens black and gold for years to come.

Playoff Predictions
Here are my playoff predictions for the NFL Divisional Round...

Baltimore @ Tennessee (Sat. 4:30pm)
I know I will take some heat for this, but I'm gonna do it anyway. The Ravens will win this game. I just like them over the Titans. They have a better defense and I just think that regardless of what Flacco does, the Ravens D will come up with big plays and score points. It wasn't an impressive with over Miami, but the Titans are just a bit overrated to me.
Baltimore 20-14

Arizona @ Carolina (Sat. 8:15pm)
I like Arizona becuase they have Larry Fitzgerald and a Clarion guy in Reggie Wells, but Carolina is a better team and has a much better running game. Oh, and solid defense. Steve Smith will have a big day as well as Jake Delhomme.
Carolina 31-14

Philadelphia @ New York Giants (Sun. 1:00pm)
This is a tough one. Maybe the toughest to call all weekend. It's hard to go against the defending world champs, but the Eagles are tough and HOT. It will be a close game no matter what. Plaxico not in the lineup may hurt the Giants, but they seem to be going fine without him too. Defense will decide the outcome.
New York 23-21

San Diego @ Pittsburgh (Sun. 4:45pm)
This should be a good game, but I also think that it has the potential to get ugly. The Chargers are a good team, but without LT, I don't know if they can win. Sproles scares me, but not enough. The only reason the Chargers won last week was because the Colts shot themselves in the foot 3 times in OT. And they don't have as good a defense as us. Ben scares me too, because it depends on which Ben shows up. Still defense wins championships and the Steelers were number 1 across the board. Yinz guys get the towels ready!
Pittsburgh 24-10

Have a great weekend Everyone...Here We Go!

Playoff Predictions

Well...I was too busy to get my predictions in for Wild Card weekend so I'm taking some time on my day off on this wonderful Pennsylvania January of freezing rain and boredom to get some in for the Divisional Round.

Of course, I'm going to start with our beloved Steelers.

I think the Steelers needed the bye week more than any of the other teams. Big Ben banged up and I think the team was in general after playing such a difficult schedule.

Now a few things to note about the contest. The Steelers were able to get the ground game going against the Browns but that means exactly dick. The Browns mailed it in about a month prior to the regular season finale.

The harsh reality is this: The offensive line isn't going to get any better folks. Out of all the playoff teams, Pittsburgh's is probably the worst. If they are able to run against the Chargers, I'll be shocked. So this will leave the game in the defense/Big Ben's hands.

As long as Arians doesn't call a lot of five step drop passing plays against a defense that can pressure and a line that can't protect the offense should do enough to win. I'm honestly surprised that Arians hasn't taken any shit over this. His playcalling sometimes makes me scratch my head (see the game vs. the Colts for prime examples). Not being able to convert third and shorts on the ground is a little disconcerting as well.

I expect the defense to come out and play well in this one. Big whoop if Tomlinson doesn't play, Sproles is more dangerous than him at this point. We'll be bombarded with a bunch of camera shots of LT pouting on the sidelines. I understand why the media gives him a free pass (good guy, had some amazing years, etc.) but still they have crucified guys for doing the exact same thing. LT pouts when things don't go his way. And the bastard cost me big in fantasy football this year.

Back to the Charger offense....Rivers will probably have to win the game himself. Sproles won't be that big of a factor, as he took a beating in the Colts contest and I don't think he can take a whole lot of beating with his diminutive frame. Gates is hobbling and Vinnie Jackson got arrested for a DUI while on probation for DUI this week. Way to put the team first Vinnie, keep it real.

The other area in which I'm concerned is special teams. I have the terrible feeling that the special teams are due to take a giant shit at the most inopportune time, as they have in the past. Overlooked in the Chargers' win vs. Indy was punter, Mike Scifres. He netted 52 yards a punt and the best field position the Arrogant Hick and his merry men had was at their own 33 yard line all night long.

Prediction: Expect the game to be ugly with some nasty weather, temps in the 10s and a chance of snow. The defense will make a pivotal play to carry the Steelers into the next round.
PITTSBURGH 17, SAN DIEGO 13.

Baltimore @ Tennessee
Hmmm...this game is loaded with enough despicable assholes that if the field caught on fire I wouldn't really care. This will be another ugly hard-hitting game but I'm going with the Titans because I think Collins will fuck up less than Flacco.
TENNESSEE 13, BALTIMORE 10.

Arizona @ Carolina
Since the Cardinals have been terrible on the road, Boldin isn't healthy, they can't stop the run (last week not withstanding, I believe that was a fluke), I don't like their chances. They surprised last week with Edgerrin James looking five years younger and their defense playing well. Snap back to reality, Williams and Stewart will have big games, Steve Smith will make a big play or two and Carolina will advance.
CAROLINA 28, ARIZONA 17.

Philadelphia @ NY Giants
Earn the number one seed in the conference and you're reward is possibly the hottest team in the NFC. An upset could happen but the Giants ground game/offensive line will keep that from happening. The Giants line is possibly the best in the league right now, however they looked like shit against Dallas. Philadelphia blitzes first and asks questions...well never. Once again, don't be shocked if Philly pulls this one out but I don't have the balls to pick it.
NY GIANTS 21, PHILADELPHIA 20.

P.S. Yeah my picks on UFC 92 didn't work out too well. Watching two of my favorite fighters getting their shit ruined was a little troubling.

What Do You Reccomend?

As everyone knows, I work at pizza shop in the Back Bay. It's definitely not my ideal job but it pays the bills I suppose. I'd say about 78% of the people who come in piss me off. Most of these being douche bag guys.

Point in Case: A Donny Douchebag walks into the shop and stairs at the menu while talking on his phone and looking at himself in his hand mirror. He probably stares at it for 5 minutes, forcing me to stand at the counter and wait for this asshole to make up his mind. Then finally in between his phone conversation, he turns and looks at me and says.

"What's your favorite sub?"

Nothing pisses me off more than this. First of all Asshole, what makes you think that we'd like the same things? Am I wearing a purple hoodie jacket and skinny jeans? Do I have my hair straightened and possibly dyed in the front? Do I say things like "Cheers" and "No Worries"? Fuck No. I'm not at a wedding and I'm certainly not in the Lion King.

God, I hate douchebags.

Long Time No Post (Work, Penguins and Steelers Oh My!)

Well damn, it's been a while since I have posted anything I don't even know where to start. I am a manager of a Hollister and let me tell you something, the holiday season blows. People will literally fuck you up if you screw with them shopping. I have spoken to more ignorant rude obnoxious people in the span of a month and a half than over the course of my first 23 years of life. The vast majority of people who shop at my store are actually very nice. It's just with there being 10 times as much foot traffic in a day that means ten times the douchebags who ruin lives also decide to make the trek into Hollister and cause a ruckus in any way possible, making my life a nightmare. So, you may now realize why I have not written anything in a while as I have been quite busy and stressed out. Out of this I do have some pretty good stories which I may choose to share at a later date.



So, The Penguins are shitting themselves as of late. Here is my proposition.

1. Quit switching up the lines, in a team where chemistry has been a weak spot (minus the Staal, Cooke, Kennedy combo before he got hurt) switching them up just as things get rolling will not help.

2. Shoot the fucking puck.

3. Get rid of Satan and Ryan Shitney and pick up a winger to ink long term to play beside Crosby. Satan, is not playing bad but lets face it he doesn't have the connection with Sid that there needs to be to have a great first line. Both Goligoski and Letang have been playing well, since Shitney has come back into the lineup our powerplay has seem to have gotten worse. He's a bum, he needs traded.

4. Give every single player, minus Malkin, Sid, Staal, Cooke, Dupuis and Wallace a swift and steady kick in the genitalia. They are all playing like they don't give a shit.

5. Someone get into a fucking fight will ya? I feel like no one fights anymore. Granted I miss a game here and there for work, but it just seems in a close game like the one against Montreal someone should have dropped the gloves gained a little momentum and we could feed off of it. I really miss big Georges and Ruutu right about now.

6. Lastly, send Fluery somewhere to learn basic goaltending. The man makes some of the most insane saves of all time but he lets and average shot from the blueline in the back of the net to lose a game. He does that 5 times a year and that could be the difference between a division title and being out of the playoffs all together in a close Eastern Conference.



Now on to the Steelers. It's playoff time baby. I think that we are going to see a great year in the NFL playoffs this year. There are no teams that are so dominant that they will just storm through the playoffs uncontested. Steelers have as good of a shot as anyone to take home another super bowl trophy.

Trick's Keys to A Steeler Super Bowl win:

1. Big Ben needs to be smart with the football. He is trying to force the issue waaaaay too much. If he eats the ball and runs for 2 or 3 yards a couple times a game instead of taking a sack or throwing a pick we would see a different team.

2. Run the fucking football. Lets face it, as a manager of the game Ben is great, he controls a drive and seeing all of the 4th quarter heroics I like it when the ball is in his hands. He is just not a fantastic passer. Short passes to ward and miller are the way to go but throwing it as much as we do is just not steeler football. Parker and moore can run, give it to them a little more, balance the attack. Oh yeah and put a fucking full back in the backfield, this 3 tight end shit is silly.

3. Rest up during the bye, get harrison, ben and any other banged up player especially on the defence ready to go. By the way things are going it looks like the Colts and Baltimore will make it through to the next round, which puts the steelers against the colts. We need everyone on defence to be 100%.

4. Get ahead early. When teams have to play from behind in the playoffs it gets rough. If we get an early lead, the opposing team takes more risks and risking anything against the leagues number one D is not a good call.

5. Lastly, rattle the opposing teams QB. Remember in the super bowl run when we beat indy? It was because Peyton Manning was rattled and made poor decisions. Harrison and Woodley need to do just that.


Threre you have it. I will be going the the Steelers first playoff game. I have yet to go to a playoff football game in my life so this gives me an erection. Hopefully I can get some more posts for you guys soon. Hope everyone had a good holiday season. Peace.

Xbox/Microsoft can suck it and UFC 92

Now by most accounts I'm a pretty laid back guy. I know I can be quite bitter at times but generally I don't get angry, unless the Steelers/Florida State lose and so on....

However, that all changed when my Xbox 360 recently decided to take a shit on me.

Here's what happened. Something with my AV connection is no longer working, I'm getting audio but no video. Thinking it was the cables a friend of mine (yes bice I do have friends) let me borrow his. Low and behold that wasn't the problem.

So I placed a call to xbox and they told me that I needed to send it in for repairs. Oh okay no big deal till those fagglers told me I had to pay $100 bucks to send it in. Immediately, my built in bullshit detector went off and mine has a pretty accute sense.

I say to the customer service rep, "Why should I pay $100 for something that isn't my fault?" This is because my warranty ran out in September and it's not that red ring of whatever problem (that's why they extended the warranty). The "technician" then goes to ask her supervisor to waive the $100.

I wait about five minutes and the "technician" says the supervisor says they can't waive the $100 because the warranty ran out.

By this time, I'm livid. Xbox has a track record of shoddy equipment (red ring of death, the dvd player going to hell). I didn't have time to argue with the supervisor because I had some stuff to do but I plan on contacting them soon and I will update you all on what happens.

I'm about this close (bice pulling down his pants close) to selling off all my xbox shit and getting a playstation 3. Hell, my PS2 is eight years old and works just fine. Cheap ass xbox dicks can't stand by their own shitty product.

In other musings, UFC 92 is tomorrow and you all better watch. On paper, this is the best fight card the UFC has produced this year. Two title fights, Forrest Griffin vs. Rashad Evans for the light heavyweight title, Minotauro Nogueira (my favorite fighter) vs. Frank Mir for the "interim" heavyweight title and a good old-fashioned grudge match between Quinton "Rampage" Jackson and Wanderlei Silva III.

The winner of the Nog/Mir fight is expected to fight Brock Lesnar (a.k.a. Cock Chestnar).

Notice how his tatoo looks like a penis. Aren't I clever?

In the past two fights, Mr. Silva has put old Rampage to sleep....violently and both fighters have an immense dislike for one another.

Yeah....that's what happened the last time they fought.

My main card predictions: Evans unaminous decison over Griffin, Nogueira third round tko over Mir and Silva third round ko over Rampage, Chieck Kongo second round ko over Mustapha Al-Turk and Mike Massenzio second round submission over C.B. Dollaway.

This is it for now....I'll be back with some BCS/NFL playoff predictions. Hope everyone had a good Christmas.

WAR NOGUEIRA!!!!

Darkwing Duck: A Live Action Movie

The other day at Supremes my friend, Zack, made the statement that Darkwing Duck was more well known than Batman. My other friend, Paul, made the argument that Batman has been around for over 50 years and has been the focal point of many comic books and movies. Zack said he didn't care and that Darkwing Duck was more recognizable.

I then said that they should make a live-action Darkwing Duck movie to which Zack replied "Yeah if you can find a real duck that can play him." He was dead serious.