Tuesday, September 2, 2008

The Diary Of A Liquor Store Clerk

Something strange happened today. Actually it was totally normal. It has just been so long since I have been forced to deal with it, that it feels like a decade ago. Another one of our fine snobby customers came into the booze outlet today. All seemed to be normal. It was what appeared to be a nice lady who had some questions about a bottle of wine she had supposedly purchased at our store. I immediately knew she was lying because she kept trying to say she knew where it was at and looked at different bottles, all that had nothing in common, saying that looked like it. Well it wasn't. After she settled on some cheap imported white, she asked me if I would mind looking it up for her. I decided to teach this bitch a lesson. "I would be more than happy to help you find it" I told her. "It should only take a minute or so." So I took my fucking time finding it on our computer. After about six minutes she became frustrated. I could tell by looking at her she was getting a little impatient. "It should only take another minute" I explained "This list is six pages long." She decided that she was going to go into the Giant Eagle and try to piss me off or show that she was unhappy, but I didn't give a shit. I then printed out the page so that when she came back she could see the result. Let's just say it wasn't good for her. When she came back I explained to her that the wine she was seeking was not available in the state of Pennsylvania. "I'm sorry to inform you that it is unavailable in our state" I told her. She was upset and responded by saying "could I ask you another question without you being so rude!" No you didn't. Please tell me you didn't call ME rude. FUCK YOU BITCH. I was upset now and when she asked me if she could order it in from another state, I said "We don't have it in our state. We don't carry it. How much more clear do I have to be?" needless to say She left and I was happy. Just another day working in the booze factory.

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