Things That Make Me Laugh

I suppose I could write a post about the Pens or the Buccos or Jay Cutler or Tiger Woods or my sex life. But since my life is now occupied by two jobs, I decided that I would write about what makes me laugh. Just some things this past week that forced a chuckle out of me. Here it goes...

Have you ever worked at a fast food place like me? Of course you have. Well I am sure that you have had the same experiences I've had too. The other day I wasn't very busy, working the front counter when a gentleman walked into McDonalds. I approached my register, but he walked past me into the rest room. So I waited for him....and waited. He then left the store. My biggest suprise was yet to come. I suppose you think I am going to tell you that I walked into the rest room a few minutes later and found playboy and hustler on the ground with the pages all sticky or the walls covered in shit. Well, sorry to dissapoint you. I did see him in the drive thru though. Think about it, who walks inside to use the restroom and then goes through drive thru to order food? I don't know, but it made me laugh.

I was able to catch some TV the other day between jobs (actually just some commercials) and guess who I saw? Billy Mays! He was advertising some goofy glue that fixes anything. At one point he was trying to prove how strong it was by standing in a wind tunnel with the flag blowing at storm strength winds. His hair was blowing in the wind. It made me laugh.

Something else that would make me laugh would be Bice in a wheelchair. But thats not very nice.

I hope you found my stories to be funny too. See ya next time!

Opening Day: Live Blog Coming Monday

These Girls are ready for Opening Day!

Hey Gang! Haven't updated the blog in a while. It seems like either we're all blogging or no one is which doesn't give you much incentive to visit us too often. Anyway, I'll be live blogging the Bucco's opener Monday as well as reviewing MLB.TV's new features. So if you don't have a TV and nothing better to do, Be sure to stop by Classic Gang Only as we watch our beloved Pirates try to avoid another losing season.

So what changed?

A few weeks ago on the verge of an epic collapse, I wrote a blog about our favorite Pittsburgh Penguins. In the blog I was questioning if they would make the playoffs and wondering just what the hell was wrong with them. I gave a few suggestions on what they needed to do to get back on track. If you don't remember the blog you can read it here. It turns out I am more of a super genius than Mark Madden because my suggestions were spot on. Lets go over them shall we?

Step one was to get an identity as a team and a coach who is a motivator who is likable and will get down to the basics and not switch up lines all the time.

Step one, Check.
The pens have done just that. They dropped the attempts to play a defensive game. They are aggressive and it is paying off with an offence like the pens have and defencemen like Letang and Gonchar who can score both the offence and defence have gotten better. Fluery is not facing as many shots because the pens are controlling the zone. Dan Blysma has been just what the Lemieux Group LP ordered. He is a young guy who can relate to the players but has been around the game a long time and has a style of play that really fits this club. He seems to be doing nothing wrong and the team has rallied around him and really played a better more fitting style of hockey. Blysma said it best on inside penguins hockey the other day. Hockey is a game of mistakes. If you are playing the majority of the game in the opposing teams zone when you make a mistake the negative outcome from that mistake won't lead to much other than a possession change or something small. If your opponent makes a mistake in their own zone, you can generate great opportunities to put the puck in the net. The pens have bought into that philosophy and it is showing with only one game in the month of march without bringing home at least a point.

Step two was to get rid of Ryan Whitney and Satan and bring in a winger for Crosby.

Step Two, Check.
They got rid of that bum Ryan Shitney and picked up my man, Chris Kunitz. Now not only is his name very similar to another Pittsburgh legend Rusty Kuntz, he has been a perfect fit for this team. We have him for a few more years which is also a plus. He is the winger Crosby needed, a guy with good skill and hockey sense who is tough and will park his ass right in front of the net and put home the trash. Alongside that we dropped Satan down to Wilkes-Barre so we didn't take that cap hit and we brought in another veteran leader in Bill Guerin. Now our first line is playing like the first line, our second line is playing like a first line and hell our third line is playing like a first line alternate. Jordan Staal has really emerged as the player I knew he was from the start for a while people were hating on Staal but you can't argue with his production over the past few weeks. But the biggest plus for this time was ditching Shitney.

It has been exciting to watch this team return back to premier form over the past month. As it stands now it looks like they will storm into the playoffs on a high note and lets see if they can keep it up and make it back to the Cup Finals. Maybe this time Malkin won't shit all over himself in the playoffs.

Down to 16: NCAA Tournament Musings

Arguably the most exciting four days in all of sports has just passed, the two opening rounds of the NCAA Tournament. There were a couple of surprises along the way, however none of the top three seeds have been taken out.

The first day of the tournament lacked excitement, with the UCLA/VCU game probably being the best of the day. Western Kentucky "upsetting" Illinois being the biggest seed upset of the day. I don't buy that it was really an upset in the first place because the Big 10 is relatively crappy. Illinois lost a 39-32 game against Penn State earlier in the year. How in the blue hell as a major Division I program do you only put up 32 points? The top seeds rolled on with UConn, Carolina, Oklahoma and Duke all advanced. Memphis, Kansas, Villanova pulled away late with Marquette hanging on against Utah State. Clemson shit the bed and on my bracket with its loss to Michigan. I had Clemson beating Oklahoma....whoops.

Day 2 provided a little bit more intrigue. Pitt played like absolute ass and escaped the clutches of mighty East Tennessee State, who strikes me more as a non-conference football opponent for Penn State (I can't resist taking digs at Penn State/Big 10 whenever possible). Arizona pulled a "upset" over Utah. Everyone was bitching about Arizona getting in but I had a feeling that they would make some noise. They were always flaky in years past, for example losing to Steve Nash and Santa Clara as a two seed in the early 90s and winning it all as a four seed with Mike Bibby and company. However, with Jordan Hill, Nic Wise and Chase Budinger, probably three NBA level players they are all of a sudden very dangerous now that their heads are removed from their asses. There aren't too many teams who have three NBA level players in the field, let alone a 12 seed.

The night games provided us with some upsets. Cleveland State taking down a Wake Forest team that in my opinion was very flaky. The Vikings raced to an early lead and never looked back. Wake has struggled mightly on offense at times this season and it bit them in the ass against Cleveland State. I had Wake losing to Louisville in my bracket. In a game that made my blood boil was Florida State losing to Wisconsin. The Seminoles shit the bed in the second half and proceeded to lose in overtime to a middle of the road Big 10 team (Yeah, I had FSU beating Pitt...another whoops). Goodbye to Toney Douglas who was a good player that I liked. Siena beat Ohio State in double-overtime but I don't really make mention of the 8-9 games because they are always coin-flips and they usually get whipped by the one seed.

The second round started out with little intrigue. Villanova rolled over UCLA, UConn trounced A&M, Carolina beat LSU and put the SEC out of its misery. Memphis and Oklahoma had little trouble with dispatching Maryland and Michigan, respectively. Purdue helped carry the tattered flag of the Big 10 with its 76-74 win over Washington. I must bid adieu to another one of my favorite players in Washington forward, Jon Brockman. A very tough, hard-nosed player who doesn't act like a total douchenozzle, looking at you Mr. Hansbrough.

Duke survived a second half run by Texas thanks to Gerald Henderson and some awesome referreeing. Western Kentucky and Gonzaga gave the viewers the best ending of the tournament thus far. Steffphon Pettigrew (what the hell is with the two f's and the ph?) tipped in a shot to give the Hilltoppers a one-point lead with 7 seconds to play. Gonzaga's Demetri Goodson drove the length of the floor and hit a runner to give the Zags the win. Good call by Gonzaga coach Mark Few, in not calling a timeout. The WKU defense wasn't organized and Gonzaga has guards who can get to the hoop, which proved to be the difference in the contest.

Part two of the second-round saw Syracuse advance thanks to some good perimeter shooting in its win over Arizona State. ASU star guard, James Harden, decided not to show up again and big man Jeff Pendergraph fouled out with about 10 minutes left in the game. Pitt won a narrow 84-76 victory over an average Oklahoma State team. The Cowboys were shooting well to start but had no answer for Sam Young and DeJuan Blair. Xavier and Kansas rolled into the Sweet 16 while Arizona advanced over Cleveland State.

The game between Marquette and Missouri gave us a shitty way to lose the game 101. The game was tied coming down the stretch and Missouri guard J.T. Tiller got a wide open layup attempt on a screen and roll. The Marquette defenders ran into each other and Tiller was fouled. Hell you probably defend a pick and roll a thousand times a year between games and practice but that got bumbled. However, Tiller was unable to shoot the free throws so the Tigers brought in Kim English and he hit both free throws. Winding up, Tiller checked back in right after the free throws. I looked it up and Tiller was a 74% shooter to English's 68%. Who knows though, Tiller could be a choke artist. On the imbounds, Lazar Hayward, stepped on the line and turned it over, in a Chris Webberesque moment. Missouri hit both free throws and took a four point lead. Maurice Acker's halfcourt heave missed, but it looked like he was mugged to me and Missouri won.

Louisville did nothing to inspire confidence as the number one overall seed in its 79-72 win over Siena. Michigan State hung on because USC can't shoot worth a shit, going 1-10 from 3-point range. That about wraps everything up in the first weekend of the tournament. I have 11 of 16 and seven out of the Elite 8 remaining in my bracket.

Now on to the winners and losers.
WINNERS

1. The Big East. Five out of the 16 remaining, could've been six had Marquette not brain-farted its way home. It proved once again that the Big East was the top conference.

2. The Big 12. Three Sweet 16 teams and the conference went 5-0 in the opening round.

3. The top 3 seeds. Every single one, two and three seeds advanced. Even though Louisville and Pitt looked shaky, as long as your playing another day, that's all that really matters. UConn and UNC had very little trouble as well.

LOSERS
1. The ACC. In the running with the Big East for top conference billing. Didn't quite happen that way. Boston College looked listless in its pounding against USC. Clemson couldn't figure out how to beat a zone, so it relied on bombing away to a tune of 5 for 22. Terrance Oglesby and K.C. Rivers couldn't hit the water if they fell out of the damn boat and Oglesby got tossed for throwing an elbow. Good work Clemson. Florida State's inexplicable bed-shitting against Wisconsin. Maryland won one but got thumped by Memphis. Topped off by Wake Forest getting mauled by Cleveland State, the ACC has done horribly. UNC and Duke are all that's left and that's just as many teams as the crap-ass Big 10 (Mich. State, Purdue).

2. The Pac-10/SEC. Arizona is the only team left out of the Pac-10 and the SEC only got three teams in and they were all sent packing.

3. CBS. Jesus Christ, does CBS stand for Commercial Broadcasting Station. If not, it should. The amount of commercials was complete and total overkill. Every time out = commercial. Hell, it was more unbearable than its football broadcasts.

4. The "Cinderellas." Not one of them made it to the Sweet 16. Don't call Arizona one for reasons I've previously stated.

That about does it for the first weekend of March Madness. The fun starts back up again on Thursday.

Gorzo-GONE-y

Well, it looks like the old weight loss during the off season doesn't make a damn bit of difference for old Gorzo. He was sent down to Triple-A earlier today by Neal Huntington in an apparent effort to send a message. That message being: You Suck.

It's sad, really. I mean just two years ago, Gorzo was the ace of the staff. A future New York Yankee, if you will. In fact, he even got his own bobblehead the following year. (Other notable Pirates Players who received Bobbleheads: Chris Duffy, Ronny Paulino, Mike Williams and his 13.55 ERA. )

Personally, it seems a little pre-mature to send Gorzo down. It's still spring training and we all know Spring Training stats aren't supposed to mean anything. You have a guy who's been successful for you in the past and no one else is really setting themselves apart from the other candidates. I.E. Virgil Vasquez had a terrible outing last night. Why not at least give him a few more spring starts to redeem himself?

On the other hand, maybe this will motivate Tom. If the end result means getting Gorzo back to his 2007 form, I'm all for it.

For Bob Smiziks take on the Gorzo demotion Click Here.

A Formal letter to Jay Cutler

Dear Mr. Cutler,

You have got to be the biggest cry baby I have ever seen in my life. When you're on a team that hasn't made the playoffs in years, anyone, even you, is expendable. In case you haven't heard, the NFL is first and foremost a business, and if the Broncos could have traded you for a few pieces that would have made the team better then that's what they've got to do. I mean you've lost more games than you've won in your career and you're a douchebag.

In the end, YOU DIDN'T EVEN GET TRADED. But now, you're feelings are so hurt that you'll show the Broncos! You'll put your Denver area home up on the market. That'll teach them a lesson for sure. Maybe you can refuse to go to team meetings as well. Oh wait, you did that too.

Wah Wah, I'm a baby.

There's actually been rumors that you may get traded to the Browns for Brady Quinn, which will give me another reason to hate you. I'm not really a fan of over-rated Brady Quinn either but when he is confronted with questions about him being traded, he responds by saying he's just going to continue to work hard and whatever happens, happens. That sounds like a very professional answer. Maybe you should take a page out of Brady's Book. That is if you can read.

It is my hope that you do get your wish and get traded. Hopefully to Detroit. That way you will be terrible next year in Fantasy Football and Carroll will curse the day he ever drafted you.

Sincerely,

Jason Bice

UFC 96: A First Person Recap

Let me start out by saying that UFC 96 was my first MMA event I've ever attended. Being from Pennsylvania (the law-makers finally did something right and sanctioned it recently) and not making a lot of money, the four hour drive to Columbus would be the closest I would get. Unfortunately, I was unable to enjoy the full experience of the weekend (the Arnolds/Weigh-ins) because my job prevented me from leaving until Saturday.

My friend and I arrived in Columbus around 4:30 p.m. and the arena was easy to find, parking wasn't a problem or outrageously expensive ($10).

After the four-hour trek, we figured we would get a bite to eat and a couple drinks before the fight. We found an establishment called Brothers just up the way from where we parked. The food didn't look bad, the service was good considering how busy the place was and the drinks were reasonably priced. The funny thing about Brothers was I've never been in a bar in which 95% of the patrons could probably kick my ass. Usually, the ratio is a little closer to 50%.

Around 6:45 we made our way to the Nationwide Arena. The line to get in was fairly long but from when the gates opened, getting in wasn't a problem. We took a walk around the arena and it was really nice. I saw why other arenas built afterward were modeled after Nationwide. Since I was still hungry, I sampled a hot sausage and fry basket for $8.75. The food was good and the staff at the arena were friendly and courteous. The beers they had on sale were predominately Anheuser Busch products (go figure). A 24 ounce can of Budweiser/Bud Light were going for $10. I'm not sure where that price compares to others but at PNC Park I can get a 16 oz draft for $6.75. If you stay past the 7th inning to watch the Pirates, they should be free.

The evening kicked off with a lightweight bout between Aaron Riley and Shane Nelson. We took our seats just as the fight was brought to a controversial early stoppage by referee Rick Fike. Check that, horrible early stoppage as Riley pulled guard after taking two rights from Nelson. So the event got off to a dubious start. The next match that Fike referreed, which one escapes me at the moment, he received a heavy dose of boos from the Columbus crowd.

Up next was Brandon Vera vs. Mike Patt, with Vera likely needing to win to stay in the UFC. What amazed me about this fight was the volume of Vera's leg kicks. Hearing them crack like a whip from the upper bowl is a lot different than hearing them on television. Patt was very clearly over matched in this contest.

Tim Boetsch vs. Jason Brillz was next on the card. Boetsch got the better of Brillz in the the first round. Rounds two and three, Brillz took him down and wore him out for the unanimous decision.

The last two fights of the undercard saw Kendall Grove keep his job in the UFC with a straight right hand, followed up by elbows against Jason Day. Tamden McCrory beat an over matched Ryan Madigan with a first round TKO.

There is a little lull in the action but before the main card starts the UFC plays a highlight reel to the tune of "Teenage Wasteland" that got the crowd fired up. The highlight still gives me chills.

Off we go to the main card. During the opening crowd shots, there was a very attractive girl who was well-endowed jumping up and down shown on the big screens. This got one of the biggest crowd reactions of the evening.

Gray Maynard and Jim Miller open up the televised portion of the card. Basically, Miller couldn't take him down and Maynard outpointed him on the feet.

However, during the second round, a guy two rows in front of me fires up a joint. Hell, I went to a fight and a Tom Petty concert broke out. He was not too shy about the doobie either. He blew the smoke everywhere and our whole section reeked of pot. Some people laughed, some wanted more of the smoke, others looked disgusted. But, no one said anything and Cheech stayed there the whole fight. Ballsy or stupid, you be the judge.

After the Maynard fight, Brock Lesnar who was sitting in a box about 100-200 feet or so to my right. He stepped out and gave a wave to the crowd but only a few people in my section saw him. Good lord was he huge.

Anyways, the Matt Hamill/Mark Munoz fight was next. Hamill came out to "Snoopy Hang on" or whatever it's called. Everyone was chanting O-H-I-O. Being a Steeler fan and a Pennsylvanian, I would rather lose a finger than take part in this chant. I take solace in that the Steelers always slap around the Browns and Bengals.

So the fight starts out as a feeling out process but once Hamill figured him out he landed a massive head kick that knocked Munoz cold. Two meaningless Hamill punches later the ref steps in.

What they didn't show you on the pay-per-view broadcast, was Munoz was down for about 10 minutes. The EMT's were in the ring with the stretcher and everything else. Thankfully, Munoz left the Octagon under his own power with a neck brace.

The next fight beween Pete Sell and Matt Brown also drew the ire of everyone in the arena. Brown starts out quickly and has Sell in big trouble. Yves Lavigne looked like he was going to put a stop to it. Nope, so Sell just catches more of a beating. Brown had his hands raised in disbelief as Sell was out on his feet. Brown just pushed and punched him two more times before Lavigne finally stepped in. Most of the crowd around me basically said, "WTF?" The fight should've been stopped way earlier than that.

Shane Carwin proved one thing in his fight with Gabe Gonzaga; he has extrodinary power. Even though Gonzaga's hand were down after the clinch (bad idea), Carwin knocked him cold with a straight right without stepping into it.

The main event was a closer than expected fight with Rampage Jackson picking up the decision. The crowd, at least in my section, was split between the two. Cheech, from earlier, stood up in his messed mind state and screamed "Dean of Fucking Mean" then almost fell over.

The heat that the crowd gave Rashad after the fight was astounding. By far, the loudest crowd heat. Rick Fike's awesome refereeing also drew the ire of the Columbus crowd. Rampage was a big favorite with the crowd as well as Hamill. The girl jumping up and down in the beginning was also a favorite.

Getting out of the arena wasn't too bad, all things considering. From the end of the fight till we were out of Columbus took about 45 minutes or so.

Now on to what I didn't like:

1. The soundsystem. At least where we were at the bass was absolutely overpowering. I thought I was at a concert as opposed to an evening at the fights. On top of that, we couldn't hear the post-fight interviews.

2. Merchandising. I was looking for some stuff to buy of my favorite fighters and such in the arena and I could not find any. The only things I saw were shirts that just said UFC or UFC 96 shirts. I don't understand why they aren't promoting the individual fighters a lot more. This would be like shopping at your favorite pro team's arena and not being able to get jerseys of your favorite players.

All in all it was a good trip and a good show. I was unable to enjoy the whole weekend's festivities but it was a good experience. Now that MMA is finally sanctioned in Pennsylvania, I'll be able to check out some smaller shows.

WTF IS HAPPENING!!!!

OK....So the Penguins have once again found a way to lose a game. It was great seeing them win seven games in a row. But now they seem to be doing another turn around for the worse. Yesterdays game was very hard to watch. They started off well but then let Ottawa back into the game in the third period. Then lost it in the shootout. OUCH! Granted it was nice to get one point, but this was definitely a game they should have gotten two points. Regardless, they need to go back to their winning ways starting today. The Pens kicked off a huge eight game homestand yesterday and there would be no tougher way to start it than by losing their first two games of the homestand.

Here are the things that the Penguins need to do if they are a serious playoff team....

1)Score on the Power Play: The Pens seemed to get their PP back on track when Gonchar came back, but the last three or four games have been shit on the PP. This to me is priority number one for them. A power play goal yesterday gives you the win. It didn't happen. Plain and simple, if you don't score on the PP, you don't win.

2)Play 60 minutes: I know the Pens are a good team. But they aren't a good team when they are playing their asses off for 5 minutes and then on vacation for 10 minutes. You dont win hockey games by playing inconsistent. Every team spaces out for about 5 minutes during the game. It happens. But the Pens seem to just totally shut it down for about 10 minutes in the third period. If there is one period you can't afford to let up it's in the third. I hate to say this, but if you do this in the Cup Finals or even the Eastern Conference Finals...YOU LOSE. It's that simple. The Pens need to start playing better through the game and especially in the third period.

3)Faceoffs: Jordan Stall was on the ice yesterday for (I think this was right) three faceoffs during the OT period in our end. As I recall, he didn't win a single one. Fleury was amazing during that 2 minute period when the Sens had a PP. A lesser goalie would have given up a goal. But the Pens need to get better on faceoffs. They were solid on faceoffs until Mike Zigomanis (pictured above) was hurt. It was about that time the Pens started playing like shit. Zigomanis is currently on IR and I don't know if he will be back for the playoffs or not. He is a very solid faceoff guy and should help them if he can return.

There you have it. Three simple ways the Pens can get better. Also this homestand is huge. The Pens host the Bruins today and will then host the Thrashers, Kings, Flyers, Flames, Rangers and Devils. Then they finish the season off visiting the Hurricanes, Panthers and Lightning, come home to face the Islanders and then travel to play the Canadiens to end their regulars season. That is a total of 12 games remaining in their schedule....the homestand being extremely important.

The Pens need to beat the bubble teams and the teams that they are fighting for a playoff spot with (Flyers, Rangers, Panthers, Hurricanes and Canadiens). The Pens have 80 points and are the 6th seed. If the playoffs began today we would play the Capitals in the opening round. I see no reason the Pens couldn't get to the 4th seed. Of their final 12 games, the Pens are playing 7 playoff teams (teams in the playoffs if they started today). It will be a tough end to the season but if the Pens get hot going into the playoffs....anything can happen.

How High Can They Go?

Wayne Gretzky holds alot of NHL records. All of the following are Gretzky records that will likely never be touched: 1981-82 he scored 92 goals in a season, 1985-86 he scored 215 points in a season (he went over 200 points three other times in his career), and he scored 50 goals in 39 games during the 1981-82 season. Looking at all of these records makes you realize how great he really was. I want to make the point also that the 1980's was a time when the game was very offensive and goaltending was poor. I think players like Gretzky and Lemieux would have had the same kind of success in this era because they were that damn good (Lemieux by the way is the only other player I know of to come close to Gretzky's feats). But this begs one question....how great will this group of players we are watching now become (Crosby, Ovechkin and Malkin)?

On NHL.com last week John Buccigross recieved an email from a reader asking what he thought that these three players would reach in terms of their peak (Goals, Assists and Points) in their careers. I could go into a very long dissertation of how this could happen and the factors involved in it. Maybe I will this weekend with my extra day off, but regardless its interesting to wonder. Buccigross however feels that the peaks for the three players should be about this: Ovechkin's line from last season (65-47-112) with a possibility of 70 goals in a season next year or the year after if he stays hot, Crosby should have a line of about 45-101-146 if he gets that scoring winger he needs but it could be around 38-94-132 given the parity in the leage, Malkin on the other hand could go even higher. He could end up with a line of 54-90-144 but he also said that he wouldnt be suprised to see a line of 61-101-162 in the future simply because Malkin keeps getting better and better. The biggest point is that Crosby is shooting less and Malkin is shooting more and getting more assists. The whole point of this post, is that its going to be very exciting to see these three players the next couple of years. I hope every day that any or all of these three will challenge one of those records. Crosby is hailed as the "Next One" however I think that Malkin will be better because of his size. Ovechkin could have a problem with injuries if he continues to play the way he does. Stay tuned for a more interesting, longer post in the coming days and check out the links below....

John Buccigross wrote a solid article about play-by-play announcers and their relationships with local fans this week on ESPN.com

Read more about the 50 in 50 feat on wikipedia.org

Just A Thought

Ryan Whitney is gone and the penguins win like 6 in a row. Coincidence? I think not.

I Got Laid Off So WPXI Could Host A Stupid Party

As most know by now, I work at shitty McDonalds. I did have a nice job at WPXI for two months when they told me the economy was "too bad" to still employee me. So I took my shit and left with no hard feelings. But now I am a little pissed. It seems like WPXI has been hosting a ton of parties since I left. Maybe its because they know they are such a shitty station that they need to do somthing to make themselves look good. I dont know. But recently they hosted a party at some new night club called Dolce and also had Conan O'Brien in town. Click on the links to read the stories and look at all the douches that showed up just to say they could rub shoulders with a super bowl MVP and the new face of late night. I suppose its no suprise that a bunch of WPXI employees showed up. But regardless I'm bitter. You would think that a place of business would know how they are doing financially to determine if they could keep employees longer than two months. And I doubt that Conan just shows up for free. It may be in his contract to visit affiliates, but I doubt it. I am willing to bet money that they paid and made arrangements to have him come in. I dont see celebrities visiting other TV networks in the region. So that is my rant. Have a nice day!!!

Another Reason to Hate Jay Cutler

So poor Jay Cutler is crying about a trade that didn't even happen. Maybe he should be crying about how he's never won anything or about how he can't play a full season of decent football. It seems that every season the Broncos get off to a good start and everyone is ready to herald them a great team. I can rip on Cutler all day but Gene Wojciechowski does it better.

Pirates Indian Pitchers on MSNBC!

I'm sure you've probably all heard this story by now. I like the comment about the new guys pitching beside "the leagues best." Wah Wah Wah

Jason Calls His Mom: The Dishes

This is the latest of a series of videos in which I call my mom because I don't know how to do simple things.

There is a God. Shitney is OUT!

This Will be short and sweet. Ryan Whitney is gone (cue applause and fanfare)! If you have been a loyal follower of our blog here, you are well aware of my long standing hatred for Ryan Whitney. I hated him before it was the cool thing to do. It seems over the last few weeks people have been joining in thinking they were the first to be anti-Whitney. I Assure you they were not. I have hated him for quite some time. People called me crazy when I would say he is the worst defensive player on the team and makes more mistakes than a bum like Eric Godard (editorial note: if you are reading this Mr. Godard you are not really a bum please don't punch me in the face). One of my best friends and fan of the blog Sam has been a long hater of Whitney and I have to give him props for propelling my extreme dislike for him into the realm of pure hatred. Thanks Sam. So even if we didn't get much in return for him, anything is better than that ass clown. Hell, I would have taken Michele Oullet back for Whitney. I think it was a move to get a cheap decent player and some cap room to possibly bring in a big name with an even bigger trade. I'm interested to see how it goes before the trade deadline. We will keep you all posted. Until next time kids.