I realized something today. There is definitely a God. If you find what you are meant to do in the world, the big guy upstairs will hook you up. Michael Phelps is hideous. Without a shadow of a doubt, he is one of the goofiest looking people on the planet. The thing is, the dude is incredible. Men, women, and all those in the animal kingdom would probably bang the guy just because he is an amazing athlete and rich as hell. Like I said, I don't like to make fun of ugly people because I could have been born that way too. I think it's not cool to make fun of people who can't help it. I'm not making fun of Phelps. I'm just stating that the man is awful looking, and that he is the Lance Armstrong of swimming. It's insane. It's true that God did not bless him with charm, good looks or a fully functional brain. So What? Because God did bless him with the ability to swim like a mo fo and have more money and fame than I could ever imagine. Oh yeah and all those gold medals. So, next time you say, "there is no God," and "What did God ever do for me?" Just look a little harder cause you could be ugly as shit and end up being the most dominant athlete in the world.
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